BREATHE IN | BREATHE OUT

A few days ago, a friend of mine said something that really stuck to me. "I want to be happy for me. I don't want to do things that don't make me happy." Hearing this, it really made me take a breath and really understand those words. She doesn't know the problems I have in my life but then again, I don't know all of hers. And I think that by hearing something like that even though it wasn't meant for me, it really opened my eyes. I have to breathe in and then eventually, breathe out. I have been breathing in all of the stressors and problems that has gotten me to where I am today that it has depleted me all of my lust, my energy, my motivations. If I want to change, if I want to actually be happy then I have to fight for it. And ever since that day, I have been trying. I have taken many walks and had many laughs with my friends and family that it isn't so bad any more. Yes, I haven't confronted the problems that I have mentally and emotionally but I'm getting there. It won't be easy to get out of the horrid past I have been living in but I'm trying. Because in the end, I have the options in defining my life. And that means, I have the option to leave from the bad and enter the good. I have a friend who hasn't been the greatest friend in the world. She hasn't made any effort, it seems to reconnect with me or to want to be part of my life any longer and before, I was angry. I hated how she chose to give a lack of interest in our hang outs. But now, all that negativity that I had gathered because of her, it isn't necessary at all. So now, I choose to leave that friendship and whenever she decides to come back, I'll be there. But right now, I can't keep believing that she won't bail out the next time we make plans. I have my life to figure out, not anyone else's. I have family to take care of, my future to keep at length and my dreams back into reality.